I was booking reservations for Restaurant Week and found out that they've just tacked on an extra week. That means an extra seven days, from January 23 through February 8. Just don't expect them to lengthen it past Valentine's Day.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Time to Let the Ox In
Yesterday was the first day of the Chinese New Year - and the new lunar year throughout much of East and Southeast Asia - and 2009 coincides with the Year of the Ox.
I didn't make ox, but I did want to celebrate my own way, not with Chinese takeout but with something much, um, healthier. Fortunately for me, author Grace Young appeared on NPR recently to discuss what foods were lucky and unlucky to eat. Her advice: eat stuff like clams, oysters, shrimps, scallops, mushrooms, etc., because they're lucky (some just because the name sounds like something positive). But it's best to avoid tofu (the "fu" sounds like the word for "negativity") and especially melon (whose name sounds like "death").
I scrupulously avoided cooking with tofu or melon (easy enough) to make the two Cantonese recipes she provided to NPR. While I cannot reprint them here, I can say the following:
- When you go all the way to H-Mart looking for Hsao-Shing Chinese rice wine and you find it (for only $3 at that), don't put it down and forget about it when you start glaring at all the different options for rice vinegar. Especially when the wait at the express lane is 20 minutes long. I then found Ying Yee rice wine at Whole Foods for a dollar more, only to find Chinese rice wine cheaper elsewhere. If you can't find Hsao Shing (or hsaoxing), or anoy other type of Chinese rice wine, just use a dry Japanese sake or a dry sherry.
- Those itty-bitty frozen scallops that you find in the freezer at Dollar General? Don't let them cook too long or they become just a wee bit tough.
- When cooking sticky rice on the stove top and it smells like it might burn, add a little more
ricewater. Or just use a rice cooker. I've never bothered with one of those but maybe I should invest in one. Or just use my breadmaker, with which I've been making some fabulous breads lately.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Baltimore Restaurant Week: Red Maple
I was not sure if I'd be able to do Restaurant Week this year, time and money wise, but I did manage to get around to it. So I asked my friend Eric if he and his better half would like to go to Red Maple. I wanted to try it out since the chef - Jill Snyder - is now locally famous. Fortunately for us (and her?) there was no ostrich egg on the menu. What was on the menu, however, was a mixed bag.
We got there for our 8:00 reservation, and got quickly seated - the only thing that happened quickly that night. I figured there were just a lot of orders. Eric, not impressed with that excuse, brought up a good point: they only have to worry about a few dishes. You see, Red Maple cut down its typical menu for Restaurant Week, only offering five selections for its first (appetizer) of three courses, five more for its entrée course, and four or five more for its dessert course. That's about 15 different things that the kitchen has to worry about putting on the tables of hungry patrons.
Red Maple is certainly not lacking in stylishness. It caters to a youngish, hip sort of crowd. As we brought up later in the evening, Red Maple is less of a restaurant than a lounge that serves food. It has not only a nice wine list, but a diverse selection of cocktails, all of which were a bit more than I wanted to pay (I just got a Sierra Nevada for $4, while Eric and Alan got a nice bottle of white wine).
The menu looked quite promising. For each of three courses, you could choose one of a variety of small plates, each of which was just large enough to share a little of everything amongst the three of us.
For our first course, we each ordered different appetizers: I got a tom kha kai sort of soup with lemongrass, coconut milk and chicken that was the best of anything on the table. The other guys ordered some okay egg rolls and some dumplings that were a bit on the bland side.
Our second course was the main one, with slightly more substantial portions than I would have expected on a small plate. That's not a complaint, mind you. This time, Alan's scallops were the tastiest thing amongst the three of us. I did like my seared and crusted tuna with wasabi pea mash, but the scallops were better. Eric, on the other hand, was thoroughly dissatisfied with his jerk chicken satay, which was very dry (to put it mildly).
For the final course, we had a selection of desserts. Both Alan and I ordered the double chocolate creme brulee. I loved this stuff, which came with some dots of whipped cream and a few blueberries on top. But it really didn't seem like creme brulee. It was more like a rich chocolate mousse with a crispy creme brulee top, but I liked it. Eric's apple tart was the best thing he had that evening, and really was the only thing he liked. Of course, the worst thing about the evening was the wait. From the time we were seated to the time we got our first course, almost a full hour had passed. As I alluded to before, the waitress said there were two big parties that came in and ordered just before us. Still, with such a limited selection of choices on the menu, one wonders if it should have taken that long, and just how long it would've taken for the food to come out had it been a regular night with the full menu!
Eric's not having much luck with my choices of restaurant.
As for my own assessment: I liked what I had. Perhaps it wasn't really worth $30, but I would eat it again. As for Red Maple: I probably won't be going back. The food is okay, and the desserts were lovely, but it really doesn't have that restaurant vibe. But at least there were no exotic eggs on the menu!
UPDATE (1/27/09) - Minx just let me know that Jill is no longer with Red Maple. She's "workin' the line" at Sotto Sopra. Is that a demotion? Regardless, our food at Red Maple the other night clearly can not be blamed on Chef Jill!
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Top Chef 5 Late-Blogging: Restaurant Wars (or, So what's the point of live-blogging a repeat?)
I've gotten away from the cable-less-ness of home and am at the parents' house, getting ready to watch Top Chef 5's repeat of "Restaurant Wars." No beer, no up-to-the-minute updates. Just occasional observations, which may be interrupted by a spate or two of laundry.
Note: I have deliberately avoided reading summaries of this episode by others, such as Minx and Nanc Twop and, well, Bravo's website, so that I could be surprised. So if so-and-so got his or her butt kicked out, I'm blissfully unaware.
1:05 Jeff: you could sell me your body, for one. WOOF
1:07 I missed Stefan's restaurant concept. Was it Scandinavian prick?
Nope - it's Euro-American douche.
1:09 Fabio and Jeff are at the bottom (popping young Jeff's ego), while Radhika's and Leah's are the top! Funny - I wouldn't have thought of covering tempura in a wet sauce.
1:10 Oh, ick, guys, get a room already!
1:12 Mmmm, these six-minute-in-the-microwave Chow Mein containers are filling.
1:14 Anyone care to bet that Stefan is the last one chosen? Oops, I was right.
1:15 An added advantage of giving your restaurant a Sanskrit name: it sounds both cool and pretentious to anyone who knows nothing about Sanskrit. Ooooh, I didn't say it was pretentious - just that it sounds pretentious to those who like pretentious-sounding restaurants.
1:17 Again ICK!!!!!1!11!!!
1:18 Shirtless Fabio - DRINK! And correction, Hosea: you had a girlfriend. Yeah, they're not romantically involved. I've had "friends" with whom I've been so "not romantically involved" too.
1:20 It's Sahana vs the Sunset Lounge! Why does this sound like professional wrestling to me?
1:21 It looks like pan-West and South Asian vs pan-East Asian/Pacific Islands.
Oh, BTW: DRINK TWICE every time Hosea and Leah's "no-mance" is shoved down our throats. And if we can hear actual sloppy wet kissing, DRAIN THE GLASS!
1:27 It'd be even cooler if she said "Welcome to Sahana" in Sanskrit. Or barring that, Hindi. Oh, and the restaurants are set up at New York's Bridgewaters Restaurant.
1:28 God, waiters are so stupid! Whine whine whine. DRINK - just cuz Jamie is acting like a douche this time.
1:29 The soup sounds good, and the judges liked Sahana's appetizer, too. Less thrilling are the couscous and the fish. The dessert even less so.
1:32 Ouch - it tastes like lotion!? DRINK!
1:33 Sunset Lounge Time! Sunset Lounge Time!
Gratuitous "I'm Italian!" reference - DRINK!
1:34 That was the strangest look of non-displeasure I've ever seen on Tom's face. "I've had frozen eggrolls that taste better" doesn't sound very positive, though.
1:35 Not bad isn't exactly what Leah wants to hear, I guess. Kissy kissy sounds, now that's what she wants to hear!
1:36 They loved the ribs, but haaaaaaated the undercooked fish under a bed of mouthwatering salty salt doused in salt.
1:37 How'z about the desserts? They're better than the meal, and better than Sahana's.
1:38 Ooooh, look what I found on Wikipedia: this could be what they put on Sahana's sign: सहाना, or "sahānā" (only visible if your browser is Hindi-script enabled).
1:39 And everyone seems to have sucked all-around.
So Team SL may win because of Stefan's dessert and Fabio's charm? This despite Team सहाना's less awful food.
1:40 Again people: DON'T BELIEVE THE CORN LOBBY'S LIES ABOUT HOW HEALTHY CORN SYRUP IS!!! IT'S A BIG, BIG FIB! (Again, thanks, Leslie, for offering me that info on high fructose corn syrup a while back - I really need to take you up on seeing it.)
1:43 Break-between-commercials - DRAIN THE GLASS!
1:47 DRINK anything but Diet Dr. Pepper, for that shameless-but-well-placed plug.
1:48 I'm guessing that Team Sunset Lounge won by a nose.
BUT: Leah, you and your cod suck.
And Stefan continues to annoy the home audience by making wonderful food while being a prick.
1:49 Y'know, the room just lights up when Toby smiles.
1:50 Carla's desserts were the suckiest part of Team सहाना. Radhika takes blame for not helping out in changing the dessert from "melting ice cream" to "yogurt soup" - and she's a pastry chef! Dude! That and she wasn't the most charming of hostesses. I know - she should've done what Fabio had done and told people she was Italian.
1:53 Most of you know this already, but I'm thinking Radhika went home, no?
1:56 I spent 6 and a half years watching Jillian Barberie when I lived in Riverside and Redlands. I had no idea she either married or gained and lost weight since I had moved. Or became a brunette.
1:58 I was right - it's नमस्ते for the head of Team Sahānā. Though Leah shouldn't quit holding her breath: it's Fabio and Stefan that helped the Sunset Lounge win. Since she made the most inedible food of the evening, she should have gone home instead!
1:59 Jeez, past season all-stars are competing against them for, I bet, the quickfire challenge.
POST-WAR ANALYSIS
I don't know quite what to think about Radhika. She seemed to be doing okay so it was probably inevitable that she get kicked out at some point. Though I did like the idea of a South Asian-American Top Chef. Ah, I guess that'll have to wait for the Next Food Network Chef 5. So namaste, Radhika, or as they say in her native Chicago, er, um, "I'm the victim of a plot to raise taxes?"
A Valentine's Day Message from Chef Duff
Yes, I hate Valentine's Day. I've never had a reason to celebrate it anyway - I'm never dating anyone on the holiday. It's just an excuse to make money (a bit more important this Valentine's Day than any other).
Does it irritate local boy Duff Goldman? Nooooooooo... Not that he needs my help or anything, but still, ya' gotta look out for the local boys (and gals). So here's a YouTube message from Chef Duff, and the ever-inimitable Mary Alice:
Was that a jellyfish-shaped cake behind them?
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Oh Noes! (or, Live-Blogging doesn't work when your satellite is out)
Live-blogging will be a bit difficult tomorrow night. The reason? My DirecTV is out. I've thought about getting rid of it. The only reason I don't switch to cable is because they suck much worse, and actually cost a bit more for the same type of package. If I did switch at all, I'd be getting the $10/month limited basic coverage that just gives me the local channels and nothin' else.
Still, it's a pain that it will be down for the next two Wednesdays, since the earliest Saturday they can come out is the one after next (at least they won't charge me for the two weeks I am sans signal). So what will that mean? Well, apart from re-familiarizing myself with my DVD collection, NPR and YouTube, as well as getting some work done, I'll have to look for Top Chef 5 online somewhere. I'll probably be behind, since they don't seem to post full eps on Bravo's website for a full week after the show airs.
It also means that I will miss seeing "Restaurant Wars" with the rest o' y'all. I'll get used to it. And besides, if I figure out how nice being without TV for two weeks really is, I may decide to give it up altogether and get Comcast's uber-limited basic cable package.
BTW - Since Monday was Edgar Allen Poe's 200th birthday, and to honor our Ravens who just got thisclose to the Super Bowl, I was going to drink The Raven Special Lager, put out by Baltimore-Washington Beer Works. Since I won't be playing the drinking game with you all tomorrow night, I'll just have to save it for when I watch it online. Whenever that is.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Snacking around the Beltway - Final Assessment
I've been very busy these last few months, so the grand plans I had for tying up all the loose ends from the Beltway Snacking series that I started way back in May of 2007 have just gotten away from me. In a way, I guess that's good, since it's given me time to reflect on it a bit more.
A few numbers:
Total duration of project (calculated by Time and Date.com: from May 22, 2007 to September 29, 2008 = 497 days (including the end date). That's 1 year, 4 months and 8 days, or 71 weeks. This doesn't count any posts that sum up the project afterwards.
Total number of Beltway Snacking posts (counting this one): 58
Total number of exits (counting A's, B's and C's): 63
Total calories consumed: priceless
Number of restaurants, markets, carry-outs and other sites visited, passed by or recommended to me by commenters (not counting ones I had written about previously) - 350
Number of those sites that I actually stopped in and visited - 102
Number of counties visited: 5 (Anne Arundel, Howard, Harford, Baltimore and Baltimore City)
Number of miles traveled: approximately 267.2 miles (or 427.52 km), according to Google Maps. This would take approximately 10 hours and 20 minutes to drive in one straight shot, without stopping (ironically, you avoid the Beltway to make this shortest possible time)
Total amount spent for food: Who the hell knows?
Total amount spent on gas: I dread the thought...
Though label-wise you can search by Exits 1 - 10, 11 - 20, 21 - 30, 31 - 40 or 41 - 44, I've divided the Beltway up here into six sections (maps created from Google Maps)...
Highlights of the "Glen Burnie" section of the Beltway (south, Exits 1 through 8A) -
Best eating in the south part of the Beltway - Two places jump out at me: El Salto I (Brooklyn, Exit 3A) has some of the most comforting Mexican food in the Baltimore area (its twin in Parkville offers pretty much the same). Pho Miss Saigon (Glen Burnie, Exit 3B) - The place is lovely. I loved dragging my sister here. She loved the cilantro in the pho. She wasn't too crazy about all the jalapeño slices.
Worst eating -The Hong Kong Restaurant (Glen Burnie, Exit 4) - The only good thing about this place is that a filling meal regularly costs under $5, perfect in this recession. But it almost made me sick, so there's that...
Most forgettable eating - The Rose Restaurant (North Linthicum, Exit 6A) - I've had more exciting food when I was laid up in the hospital on a diet of strained cream of chicken soup and Jell-O. And tastier, too. At least they're nice people. Maybe their conventions are more interesting?
One place I would've mentioned had I not previously posted about it - G&M's, of course. And the Little Grove Restaurant, despite its fairly average carry-out lunch buffet and salad bar, has wonderful spanakopita pies (both in Linthicum, Exit 8). Perchi's Peruvian Rotisserie (Glen Burnie, Exit 3B) also fits here.
One place I really need to get back to but haven't - Of those places I haven't yet visited, Stoney Creek Inn (Pasadena, Exit 1) - It looks like an inviting place, and I always love crabs. It's also beautifully located. Of those I did visit, Dotson's Barbeque (Glen Burnie, Exit 2) is one place I just have to get back to.
One place I really need to get back to, and have - Again with the Pho Miss Saigon (Glen Burnie, Exit 3B).
One place I'm kinda glad I passed - The Crab Depot (Brooklyn, Exit 3A), which had its fair share of flies and kinda smelled like poo.
Highlights of the "Catonsville" section of the Beltway (southwest, Exits 9 through 16B) -
Best eating in the southwest part of the Beltway - Taneytown Deli (Catonsville, Exit 13), which recently moved into the former Pinocchio's location. Five kinds of Reubens - that's all I'm sayin'. The Golden Gate Chinese Restaurant (Arbutus, Exit 12B) is also a constant favorite for their General Tso's and orange chicken. They're also one of the first Mom & Pop Chinese places to offer dim sum in the area (and they're one of the only ones whose food is edible).
Worst eating - The Grace Café (Arbutus, Exit 12A), just a hop, skip and a jump from the Golden Gate. The quintessential example of what Chinese carry-out should not be, but usually is.
Most forgettable eating - Caton House (Violetville, Exit 11A), which I visited for lunch just before the citywide smoking ban, so everything tasted like a bar. Which makes sense, since it is a bar. That's followed closely by Mr. G's Fast Lane Hamburgers (Gwynn Oak, Exit 15A), and the sorriest excuse for a diner hamburger at the otherwise legendary Double-T Diner (Catonsville, Exit 15B). All three? Meh.
One place I would've mentioned had I not previously posted about it - Indian Delight (Catonsville, Exit 13), which was my very first introduction to Indian food over 10 years ago. The service is sometimes slow but the food is usually quite good. They recently started charging for their buffet by the pound, which makes more sense for them if you think about it.
One place I really need to get back to but haven't - A few, actually. The Washington Blvd. pit beef truck (Lansdowne, Exit 10) is highest on my list. It's so close to much of my family and yet I never get around there. Another pit beef truck opened up a few years ago in Arbutus on East Drive (also Exit 10). Pho 1 (Catonsville, Exit 15A) is also slowly but surely nagging at me to come to it (again, hap tip to Dara).
One place I really need to get back to, and have - SugarBaker Cakes (Catonsville, Exit 13), which recently started selling Smith Island Cake slices on a regular basis. Then there's Polock Johnny's (Morrell Park, Exit 11A) - granted, I haven't gotten back in a while, so that's a priority.
One place I'm kinda glad I passed - Charm City Liquor & Deli (Lansdowne, Exit 9), which I never wrote about. Former co-workers warned me against their sandwiches. I haven't bothered to test their advice yet.
Highlights of the "Pikesville" section of the Beltway (northwest, Exits 17 through 22) -
Best eating in the northwest part of the Beltway - A three-way tie: Mari Luna Mexican Grill has homey Mexican food in a colorful atmosphere, plus they also have a smattering of Salvadoran offerings - like their tasty pupusas. And though it may be unassuming, Sion's Bakery makes one of the best chocolate-top cookies I have ever eaten (both in Pikesville, Exit 20). The IndiClub (Woodlawn, Exit 17) also has some flavorful offerings and a nice selection of South Asian and pan-Indian dishes, including my first-ever taste of idli. Just watch for the occasional irritating child or three bolting around the restaurant.
Worst eating - Lake Trout (Woodlawn, Exit 17) has the boniest fish I've ever eaten out, hands down. Plus a Yankee cornbread that really qualifies as a dessert item instead.
Most forgettable eating - One commenter (hat tip: Jazz) scolded me that I dissed the Big Cheese (Owings Mills, Exit 19), letting me know I should've ordered a sub and asked them to toast the roll. If I go back again I will do that. But in my defense (and, really, the Big Cheese's), it's not so much their cooking that was the problem, as it is the cooking of pretty much any pizza and sub shop. They were just the unfortunate example.
One place I really need to get back to but haven't - I have heard lovely things about Symone's Soul Food Café (Randallstown, Exit 18A), but I just haven't gotten back to the area yet to stop in. And for one of the few truly West African restaurants in the area, Peju's Kitchen Restaurant and Lounge (Woodlawn, Exit 17) is apparently a goodie, serving some of the only suya in the area. As for places I did not write about, commenters let me know about a few places I missed in Owings Mills (Exit 19): Rachel let me know about the Flying Avocado, and "Anonymous" pointed me in the direction of Morty's Chicken (at Snyder's Deli).
One place I really need to get back to, and have - Shaheen (Woodlawn, Exit 17)'s proprietors are from Queens, and serve some tasty halal goat, lamb, chicken, fish and vegetarian dishes. Their buffet is by the pound. Don't miss the sweets case by the front door, but watch out because you'll spend more than you want to.
One place I'm kinda glad I passed - The New York Fried Chicken on Liberty Road (Gwynn Oak, Exit 18B). I dunno, maybe I'm wrong but it doesn't sound all that interesting. Seemed kind of fast food-ish.
Highlights of the "Towson" section of the Beltway (north, Exits 23A through 30B)
Best eating in the north part of the Beltway - I was pleasantly surprised at the abundance of delicious and filling food I found at the Kabab Stop (Mount Washington, Exit 23A). For $14, you easily get twice the amount of food. I also have fond memories of the gigantic stromboli I got at Mamma Lucia's at Perring Plaza (Parkville, Exit 30B). Also, an advisory: if you order the one-pound burger at Alonso's (Roland Park, Exit 25), make sure you take most of it home. I ate half of it there, on an empty stomach, and still felt like I overate.
Worst eating - I really didn't have many bad food experiences in this part of the Beltway. So I guess I'll have to fall back on that old stand-by, the local food court at the mall. And despite the improvements they've been doing, Towsontown Center's food court (Towson, Exit 27) has some pretty lackluster eating choices. Sadly, it's still fairly standard mall food, so in comparison to other malls it's not so bad. I feel bad singling Towsontown's food court, since it's such an easy target anyway.
Most forgettable eating - If you want memorable decor, drinks or music, Hightopps Backstage Grille (Timonium, Exit 24) will maybe fit the bill. If you want memorable food, just look elsewhere.
One place I would've mentioned had I not previously posted about it - This area is one of my most well-traveled, so I've written about several of the places around here long before I got to them on the Beltway. Chiyo Sushi and Sushi Hana (both in Mount Washington, Exit 23A) are two of the better sushi joints in the area - who knew there'd be so many just in this one neighborhood? Not to be outdone, Towson has an abundance of sushi joints, all of which are pretty good. The Kyodai Rotating Sushi Bar (Towson, Exit 27) is perhaps the most authentic, with its conveyor belt of color-coded plates to tell you exactly what is cheaper than what. Outside of the sushi world, the Bel-Loc Diner (Parkville, Exit 29B) restores my faith in diners with tasty food at cheap prices.
One place I really need to get back to but haven't - I went on a date to the Orchard Market & Café (Parkville, Exit 29B). They were BYOB at the time, but had some delicious Persian food. As for places I haven't even visited or mentioned, another Persian place, the Parsa Kabob (Cockeysville, Exit 24), is one place I just never got to at all. It's on my list the next time I'm in the neighborhood.
One place I really need to get back to, and have - Maybe all those ex-pat New Yorkers are on to something about Pasta Mista's pizza (Towson, Exit 27). I haven't eaten pizza in New York (more than a few hot dogs but no pizza), but if they're all correct that it's this good then maybe I am missing something. The Mandarin Taste (Anneslie, Exit 25) is much closer to my apartment than to the Beltway. In fact, it's a good half hour walk from my place. But it's a good place to eat while your car is getting fitted for new tires at the Firestone. By the way, don't go to Firestone. They charge too damn much. For everything.
One place I'm kinda glad I passed - The Mount Washington Pizza, Subs and Indian Cuisine (Mount Washington, Exit 23A) is one of a growing phenomenon in Baltimore: the pizza-sub-and-curry shop. This one had fairly overpriced Indian food, and fairly average-priced everything else. Most of the pizza-sub-and-curry joints charge a lot more for their Indian offerings, I'm afraid. (NOTE: The review I linked to gives the place 4 out of 5 stars, so maybe I'm wrong? Who knows...)
Highlights of the "Essex" section of the Beltway (northeast, Exits 31A through 38B)
Best eating in the northeast part of the Beltway - Fractured Prune (Parkville, Exit 31A, and various other locations), hands down. Granted, I frequent the locations that are closer to me, so I haven't gotten back to this particular location since. But I am ruined for any other type of donut now, even Krispy Kremes. And I could never even think of touching a Dunkin' Donut again. Also remember the Broadway Diner (Highlandtown, Exit 33A) - there's gotta be a reason why
Worst eating - Why am I never eating at the Fisherman's Wharf (Nottingham, Exit 32B) again? One. hour. wait. for. a. fucking. fish. sandwich.
Most forgettable eating - Uncle Eddie's (Essex, Exit 38B), which had pleasant service and a pretty decent minestrone soup, but awful, awful haddock. Leave a nice tip for the waitress.
One place I would've mentioned had I not previously posted about it - CCBC Essex's cafeteria (Essex, Exit 34), but not because it's any good. Hey, I dogged on CCBC Catonsville's and Dundalk's food offerings. How did I forget to do the same for the Essex campus? I will say, though, their food - lackluster though it is - is slightly better than at the other two campuses.
One place I really need to get back to but haven't - Everyone keeps telling me how great Pizza John's (Essex, Exit 36) is, but I simply never get around there enough. I have been to the Fiesta Mexicana Mexican Fast Food (Rosedale, Exit 34), but have had no time to return. Same for the Mount Everest Nepalese and Indian buffet (Rosedale, Exit 32B), who recently celebrated their first anniversary. A little pricier than I'd like but tasty nonetheless.
One place I really need to get back to, and have - Geresbeck's, for their chocolate top cookies and other pretty good baked goods. People rave about the smearcase, which I have yet to try. Also the Original Fish & Chips, which also has some delicious hush puppies (both in Middle River, Exit 36).
One place I'm kinda glad I passed - Lin's Chinese Buffet (White Marsh, Exit 31C) in White Marsh Mall. Again, mall food is an easy target. But such a massive buffet really should have more people in the seats than just the employees.
Highlights of the "Dundalk" section of the Beltway (southeast, Exits 39 through 44)
Best eating in the southeast part of the Beltway - A few good eats here include: Weenie World (Dundalk, Exit 39), for which I have traveled well out of my way just for their wide and baffling variety of hot dogs; Bada Bing Bada Beef (Dundalk, Exit 43), with some of the best pit beef I have had recently; and Salty Dog's Crab House (Dundalk, Exit 41), for their $1 per crab every Tuesday in the fall. They're good crabs, too.
Worst eating - I didn't have much in the way of bad eating experiences in this area - perhaps by this time I had become more discriminating in where I would stop. I can tell you the least appetizing thing I did eat. It was that cup of Western fries at Micky's (Sparrows Point, Exit 42). But that was all I ate, so really it's not a very accurate read. Maybe their other stuff is good, though.
Most forgettable eating - Nothing terribly forgettable in this part of the Beltway either. I did like Maria's Pizzeria and Carry-Out (Sparrows Point, Exit 42) for its hot dog, though its pizza was kind of, I dunno, eh. But Maria's is a hard fit into this category. Really, it is the "default choice if I have to choose something for this category" choice. Though Squire's (Dundalk, Exit 44) puny lasagna, which cost too much for its portion and was only as good as any lasagna, is in the running for the "most overrated" award.
One place I really need to get back to but haven't - When I got to Merritt Blvd, I really wanted to stop in the Boulevard Diner (Dundalk, Exit 39), but with so many diners under my belt recently I just wanted something non-diner-ish. I'll get around there sooner or later.
One place I really need to get back to, and have - As noted before, Salty Dog's (Dundalk, Exit 41) and Weenie World (Dundalk, Exit 39).
One place I passed without even realizing it - That would have to be the Hard Yacht Café (Dundalk, Exit 43). Maybe it's more easily accessible by boat, but it's a bitch to get to by car.
One place I'm kinda glad I passed - Many of the half-closed businesses along North Point Road made me wonder if they were even open anymore. Papa Leone's Spaghetti House and the North Point Diner (both Dundalk, Exit 40) are notable in this regard.
Thinking about my Beltway Snacking experiment, I can say it has taught me a few important things, as I noticed around Broening Pkwy (Exit 44):
1) Both food wise and neighborhood wise, there is so much more worth exploring in Baltimore than just downtown. Don't get me wrong: Mount Vernon, Fed Hill, Fells and the Harbor are great places for dining and (in some of those places) living. But so are Glen Burnie, Catonsville, Dundalk and Parkville - and it probably still sounds strange for y'all in these areas. Same for such exotic locales as Arbutus, Middle River, Pikesville and Sparrows Point.
2) Look hard enough and you will find some cheap food, and some good food. You will find crap, too, don't get me wrong. But you have to keep looking until you find something you like.
3) There are a lot of crab shacks, a whole lot of Chinese restaurants, and a whole lot of pizza-and-sub shops around the Beltway.
4) Finally, as the tourist in me wants to scream, play the tourist in your own home town. Before I lived in Cali (and I have officially been back in Charm City for five whole years now), I never bothered to visit any of these places. I was a Southwest Baltimore County boy with only a vague notion of exactly where Essex was, and I had never even heard of Nottingham. It took my relocating out west to really start exploring Baltimore on the occasional visit back. Don't do that - explore it now! It's not like you have the money to travel these days (er, um, recession). I sure as hell don't. So don't wait until you only visit once or twice a year to really get to know your home town. This is advice not just for Bawlamorons but for everyone from New York to New Mexico, from Augusta, Maine, to Augusta, Georgia, and all over the planet. Wherever "home" is, get to know it and love it. If I can take only one thing away from my Beltway Snackin' project, it is that point. Again: get to know "home" and love it. There is much more than you may realize.
And that's it! The Beltway Snackin' experiment is officially over! But if you want to see all the photos I took on my journeys around the Beltway, go to Flickr. The set is "Snacking around the Beltway" if you want to see all 752 photos. (UPDATE - I deleted some repeats, so now it's about 740 or so.)
Listen to this post as an MP3.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
If humans weren't meant to eat sea kittens, why do they taste like fish?
I linked to this in last night's live blog, but it's probably been missed. This is stupid. Care of the folks at PETA: stop the senseless slaughter of fish by re-"marketing" them as cuddly wuddly "sea kittens."
Sea kittens!?
Pretty stupid. I tried to find a funny video to link to on YouTube - one that pokes fun at this "sea kitten" thing - but most of the videos that make fun of "sea kittens" are about as stupid as PETA's actual suggestion of naming fish "sea kittens."
So I'm just linking to a video of real kittens acting cute.
Mmmm. Tasty.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Top Chef 5 Live-Blog: Down on the Farm
It's time to get all Top Chef-y! And I'm gonna make a prediction already: It's Carla's night to go home. Yup. She's been faring pretty poorly these last few weeks, and y'all know the other cheftestants are wondering how she has been able to stick around. I don't dislike her or anything. I just think it's time to admit: it's Carla's time to pack knife and go.
Whether I'm wrong or right, I'll be drinking Harpoon Winter Warmer for my drinking game. It's got a nice flowery scent and tastes a little like allspice. It's a lovely beer.
10:00 Yep, the bald Englishman is here to stay. I dunno, he's kinda creepy.
Isn't it funny how Ariane has managed to stick around. She went from being Ms. I suck to Oh my Gawd, they LOVE what I'm doing!
10:02 Shirtless Jeff - DRINK!
Ooooh, everyone hates Stefan. Possible victim of a knife-packing accident?
10:03 And of course, TC3's winner Hung Huynh is back as guest gudge. And he and Padma get to show the arrogant ones their ingredients: make a delicious dish in only 15 minutes - with ONLY non-fresh ingredients (or as Jeff says, junk). Yeah, but what are YOU gonna eat when the zombie apocalypse happens, dude?
10:05 And the award for the douche-bags that don't realize lots of people have to subsist on canned stuff goes to: everyone on the show!
10:06 Fillet him, Hosea. Fillet him!!!
At least there were no shameless plugs. Okay, there are Spam and Cool Whip, but those are less brand names than types of food, I guess.
10:08 Hung seems more amused than appetized. But hey, the chefs thought this challenge was, well, beneath them. So you know what? Fuck 'em. Fuck 'em all. Except for Hosea. Jeff actually took his stuff and made it good. But the winner? Oh. Stefan. Herra Douchebag, as they might say in Finnish. Er, what's Finnish for "douchebag" again?
10:10 Oh, not the drawing knives thing again!
The elim challenge: creat a seasonal meal based on the animal whose name appeared on their knife.
Coming up: Jamie actually field dresses Stefan. You GO, girl!
10:14 So back in the loft, Ariane and the loveboids talk lamb, Carla and the hatebirds - that'd be Jamie and Stefan - discuss chicken. Stefan is trying to strong arm the ladies to do what he wants. Jamie ain't goin' for it.
Pork is what Fabio, Radhika and beach boy are doing. They agree beforehand to no Italian or Indian. Oh well. Should that be a DRINK for Fabio even saying "Italian"?
10:16 Yay, Jamie!!!
10:17 Hosea, dude, I don't know what you're freakin' about, man. Remember: Ariane could literally crap on the plate and the judges will think it's fried gold. Don't sweat it.
10:18 Dan Barber, famous farm fresh chef, is the host of the event. AND, no shopping at Whole Foods. DRINK, just because of Jeff's disgruntled, surfer-dude-haze despondance.
10:20 I love that they have to rewrite their menus on-site, to use farm-fresh ingredients. And you KNOW they'll have to catch and kill their own food. Heheheheh.
PETA will not be amused.
10:22 Speaking of PETA: Did you hear about this idiocy?
10:25 BTW: DRAIN THE GLASS every time Top Chef 5 comes back as a "break between commercials." Drain 'em now, y'all.
10:26 Also DRINK for Stefan acting, y'know, Stefanish. Actually, I should've been doing that the whole time, but one can only drink so much in one night. And I gotta get up early in the morning.
10:29 So... they didn't get to kill it?
Hey, I thought they weren't doing anything Indo-Italian!
10:30 Jamie, Girl, you KNOW Stefan's goin' out on his ego-trip. Just deal with it. Pre-emptive DRINK!
10:31 Okay - an hour to peel & greel, er, grill 10 cobs of corn? Wow.
And let's see what faces Tom makes today... a funny grin, an interested look at fried green tomatoes, nothing too worrisome yet. Much better than Whole Foods. All of a sudden, I feel the need to farmer's market hop.
Stefan's doing a soup. Tom thinks that's a bad idea. HAHAHAHAHAH
10:33 Why does Ariane look like she's channeling spirits or astral projecting? That look on her face is simply demonic!
I love lamb. The other night I made Giada's Moroccan lamb with couscous: just sprinkle lamb chops with salt n' pepper and rosemary, grill it, and douse it with a balsamic-honey-garlic-oil sauce. Mmmm.
10:35 And now the dishes: ah, they're going too fast for me. it's lamb and pork and chicken. Deal.
How do they like it?
The chicken is unimpressive - hot consomme is not good in the summer, but it WAS very tasty. The cutlets were good with the salad, though. Fried chicken is good, too.
Lamb people: "A mess." Toby: lamb dressed as mutton? Oooooo. Outta season, but the taters were good.
Oooh, didya see the look on Stefan's face?
The pork people: the pesto overpowers the pig. Pork loin needs fat. The best part? The fried green tomatoes.
Hmmm...
10:38 Dessert!
Chicken team's strawberry tart: lovely. They bided their thyme!
Pork team: creme brulee is too sweet. Ouchie. But it was small so not heavy.
Lamb team shortcake made a mess.
Soooo... someone on the lamb team is gonna be sacrificed tonight!
10:41 Oh I HATE Betty! She's so fake, y'know? Very mean to young Marcel - a little asswipe, but he didn't deserve all that hateful treatment. Dude!
Betty's Diet Dr. Pepper thing counts as a shameless plug. DRINK!!!
10:45 James, Carla and Stefan won. PLEASE don't let Stefan be THE winner!!! BTW: Carla's dessert was their fave, so I am wrong from the beginning. Girl is not goin' home at all.
Oh, COP OUT! Dan Barber tells all three that they are co-winners. How the lowly have risen.
Bad news, though: EVERYONE else has to go back. Again, ouchie.
10:46 That look on Tom's face was priceless. Ah, what the hell? DRINK!
Back-pedaling - It was Jeff's idea to remove the fat. And he says he's from the South. Right, so is Ariane.
Tom thinks Radhika didn't do damn near enough.
As for the lamb people: Why tenderize baby lamb? Ariane did that. Why did she alone do the lamb? Why do you people suck! YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!! (Aaaah, the grilling!)
10:49 I don't know if Hosea answered that question to their satisfaction.
10:50 I'm not sure whom they'll eliminate. Long story short: a case of ingredients in the wrong hands.
Toby: pork dish was anemic. Also DRINK since Toby just damn well ick'd me out with that "unprotected sex" with pork comment.
New drinking game rule: every pithy, bitchy thing Toby says deserves a swig. Not including the "she can't cook" comment about Ariane.
10:52 Ouch - are the judges throwing Leah under the bus for letting Ariane take the fall? Hmmm...
10:54 Yeah, and after that Slim-Fast she snarfs down five cupcakes in five minutes.
10:55 I'm getting tired. Is this show over yet?
10:56 Tom, blah blah, Earth, yadayadayada.
I don't know who's leaving. I just can't say. I'm thinking Leah or Ariane.
The lamb team is THE losing team - so it's Ariane, Leah or Hosea.
Mmm, umm, I'll flip a coin and go with Ariane.
10:58 And I was right. But y'know: a Top Chef should know how to truss up a piece o' lamb.
Coming up next week - uh-oh, it's Restaurant Wars. Do I smell a 75 minute episode next week?
Oh ICK, people. Get a frickin' room!
POST-GAME ANALYSIS -
She ain't shittin' fried gold anymore. I'm surprised Ariane lingered so long, but that first episode left a bad impression I guess. She seemed to pick up steam and could do no wrong after that. Tonight was a bad night for most of the cheftestants, and frankly, Ariane deserved to go as much as Leah or Hosea. But again: Ariane's hometown of Verona, NJ, isn't that far away, so at least it's not too far.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Best of 2008 Part IV: Some Non-Food Faves of the Previous Year
This is my final Best Of post for the past year. Again, just for perspective. Though stay tuned sometime next weekend for my final Beltway Snacking post, to tie up a year and a half of cruising 695 for grub.
Favorite thing about Baltimore - It's a more diverse and cosmopolitan city than it lets on, without any of the pretension of some of the bigger ones.
Fave Baltimore attractions - The parks. My particular faves: Patterson, Druid Hill, Robert E. Lee. Did you know Baltimore has a Robert E. Lee Park? It's off of Falls Road. Clark's Elioak Farm - the new site of much of the Enchanted Forest - is also on that list.
Fave museum - The Walters, especially for its exhibit of Hubble Space Telescope photos being displayed as art for the first time in art museum history! I hope the economy doesn't keep the place from remaining free. The The Visionary Art Museum and the newly-reopened American History Museum are tied for a close second.
Fave movie of '08 - I didn't see many new movies this year. Milk was good, followed closely by - go fig with me - Diary of the Dead.
Fave movies I rediscovered in '08 - Lately I've been watching a whole lot of two movies, The Stepford Wives (1975, not the stupid remake) and The Mostly Unfabulous Social Life of Ethan Green (2005). It's a surprisingly charming gay romantic comedy!
Fave stage play or musical - The recent Sunday in the Park with George revival. But I only saw one musical this year, so I don't have a lot of choices to choose from. I saw Varla Jean Merman's Victory Lap Dance at the Hippo. That was funny. Girl's still got it, better than ever!
Speaking of which...
Fave YouTube video of the year - I'm a softie for that Matt dancing around the world guy.
Runner-up - Wicked Awesome Films' strange Obama lovefest. Too funny.
Honorable Mention 1 - Cooking with Andy! His Halloween episode wasn't the most pathetic, but it was the most funniest. Most haven't been too funny since.
Honorable Mention 2 - The Toyboize didn't make that comeback they so desperately wanted. Poor schmucks. Who could forget their big hit, "Sherbert Dip!?"
Honorable Mention 3 - YouTuber Rocket Michael channels Ina Garten into his 20 year old twink body. How bad can that be?
I should've also mentioned this uber-geeky Doctor Who mashup - every episode of the show's 45 years crammed into 7.75 minutes. I just love montage clips. And then there's "Pork and Beans," Weezer-style, but embedding has been disabled by request, for some silly reason. I don't know why so many bands specifically request "Embedding" to be "disabled." It's stupid. So I'll link to the bastards' video instead. I shouldn't even do that. It just isn't the same.
Fave TV Show - Once more, Doctor Who is my favorite. Intervention and The Soup are tied for second place. Mad Men, Code Monkeys and The Big Gay Sketch Show run third, though I haven't had much time to see them these days. Note that I didn't mention any cooking shows. Those people are all starting to irritate me anyway.
Fave TV Show Episode - The one on Saturday Night Live where Tina Fey first did her Sarah Palin impersonation. Heheh.
Fave radio show - Marketplace, NPR's economics news show. I hate economics, so it must be amazing if I like this show. They make it so interesting! And Kai Ryssdal's a nice piece of eye candy when you get the rare glimpse of him on the internet.
Fave book - Comedy memoirs seem to be my favorite books these days (other than cookbooks that is). No, I actually haven't had the chance to read David Sedaris' new one yet. I have too little time to read it so I'm waiting for the audiobook version. My most favorite of the past year is another funny memoir from a North Carolinian (though a native, not one dragged there from New York by his parents), Celia Rivenbark's Belle Weather: Mostly Sunny with a Scattered Chance of Hissy Fits. Scott McClellan's What Happened, his memoirs of his years withe the President, are riveting once you get past the first few years in Austin (but the last chapter is a bore). For something particularly bizarre: The Onion's Our Dumb World, an atlas. If that wasn't enough, they have an audiobook of that, too. You have to catch their Our Dumb World Dance Remix.
Fave song -Not really much this year. It hasn't been a good year for new music. If I had to choose one, it would be "Pork and Beans" by Weezer. Though I think I'll poke my eardrums out if I have to hear that God-d***ed song about fathers being good to their daughters before they turn into mothers or some bullsh*t like that. Absolutely idiotic song.
Fave gadget of 08 - The ION 2 PC tape deck, which is technically new to 2007. I bought it at Sharper Image just as they were going out of business, so I got it for substantially less than I would have. Now all my old tapes from the late 80's and early 90's are alive again on my MP3 player!
Favorite Presidential election in recent memory - the one where Obama won. I gotta admit I'm pleased about that, to say the least :) Okay, political stuff done!
Fave political website or blog - Okay I lied. Fivethirtyeight.com. Man, it's addictive. And Nate Silver was only one state off in his electoral vote predictions for Election Day: he got Indiana wrong, but everything else right! Alright, now political stuff done!
Three things I'm proud of in 08:
- Presenting at the Great Tastes show in February. That was very cool. Dara, if you're organizing another round table - okay, I'm way too busy school-wise until May. But if you need someone for a panel after that, just let me know!
- Walking seven miles back and forth between my apartment and Whole Foods in Mount Washington.
- Cramming six months worth of Dutch into my head for the Amsterdam trip in March, although I ended up not needing it, and only talking to one person in Dutch beyond a simple Dank u vel. That was just when I bought a postcard. At least it gave me some insight into what the street signs said. What was funny, though, was running into a Mexican tourist who tried to communicate with me in Dutch, and then we ended up having this conversation in Spanish. Geel grappig!
One thing I'm looking forward to in 09 - The recession receding (hopefully)! And finishing my second Masters
One thing I'm not looking forward to in 09 - Job-hunting, and starting to pay back the student loans :(
And lastly: One New Year's Resolution - Hmmm, I don't have one, really. Since I'm on a more fixed budget than last year, one good resolution is as good for anyone: eat more of the stuff in your own pantry, and less of what you can find in the restaurants! Also, go grocery shopping less often. I am already doing that and it's amazing. I used to have so many things that caught my eye in the supermarket just go to waste in the fridge before I even got around to using them. It's just not worth it!
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Best of 2008 Part III: The Best Brains Awards for the Worst and Most Average of 2008
Unlike the Oscars, you won't see much here. As sucky as 2008 was (I'm thinking the economy here), food-wise it really wasn't bad, and for me I had some very nice adventures that I'm thankful for. So here they are - the somewhat sparse Second Annual Best Brains Awards for the Very Worst and Inescapably Average Food of the past year. Named for Mike, Joel, the Bots and their creative masters and mistresses, the men and women who brought us MST3K and now bring us (separately) both RiffTrax and Cinematic Titanic. I've tried squeezing in cheesy production numbers like last year, but I'm tired and busy so don't expect the kind of crap you get at the Oscars each year. Servo, the envelope if you would...
The Best Brains "It looked better in the dressing room" Award for a second-guessed dining experience
Essex Diner (diner - Essex) - I actually struggled to find a restaurant to put here, so the Essex Diner only half-deserves this award. Their sliders sandwiched in dinner rolls really aren't bad, their service is fine, and the photos up and down the wall are kind of homey. But in retrospect, their sliders were nothing special. But I'd still go back to try other stuff.
The Best Brains "I need some hot stuff, baby, this ev'nin'!***" Award for an exceptionally overrated dining experience - They're not all that, chips or no chips...
Tie - Benny Greengrass (deli / Kosher - Upper West Side, Manhattan, New York, NY) and
Rutt's Hut (hot dogs - Clifton, NJ) - The last time I went to New York I wandered around my last day, having checked out of my hostel, er, hotel, looking for good grub. I was sure I had found it at the legendary Benny Greengrass, the "Sturgeon King". Maybe I'd be satisfied had I gotten their uber-expensive fish. But all I got for $12 were three overpriced latkes with a semi-frozen clump of sour cream and a teacup of milk with a big blob of chocolate syrup at the bottom (that last part was just shameful). I guess this is why they're not known as the "Latke King." Having made the long trip and not expecting to be back for a while, I at least wanted to make the half-hour detour from Iselin (where I parked and took the New Jersey transit into the city - yes, it was cheaper than parking in Manhattan) to Clifton, where I could find the much-raved-about Rutt's Hut. Everyone from the Travel Channel to the Food Network raved about their "rippers" - hot dogs that are juicy on the inside but cooked so that the outside is crusty and rips open when you eat it. All I got was a slightly juicy, mostly dried up crunch out of my two dried out sticks of hot dog meat. To do that to a weenie should be a crime.
Satisfying looking franks - but looks can be deceiving. The pile of fries were good though.The Best Brains "Seventh time around...***" Award for places that you just have to wonder why they're still open after all these decades - They got away with being a local institution by serving this slop?
Tie - Avenue Diner (diner - Hampden, Baltimore) and Uncle Eddie's (American / family-style, Essex)
I'm not picking on Essex, I promise. I just didn't have the best eating experiences there this past year. Case in point: Uncle Eddie's, an area institution that recently moved into a very yellow building. I ordered dinner there for my Beltway Snacking series. The service is extremely friendly, so I felt bad writing about their "popular dish for six decades" panfried haddock. Dense, dry, bony and devoid of all flavor. They must stay open for other reasons. I didn't write about the Avenue Diner, which was actually the first place I ate out at in 2008. I can't quite remember what I had, I think it was pancakes. Or eggs. Whatever it was, it was big, forgettable and flavorless. Except for the Diet Coke, which tasted like dish water. The City Paper claims it's closed, but I won't since I've made that mistake here before.
The Best Brains "NoDoz***" Award for an exceptionally average dining experience - Quality. Yay.
Akbar Restaurant (Indian - Mount Vernon, Baltimore) - I am really befuddled as to why so many people say this is such a great place. The last time I went to Akbar - admittedly it had been a while - I went to the buffet. Yes, it was the tail-end of the buffet, but I've caught many a Baltimore-area Indian buffet just before closing, and they've all pretty much satisfied me. And it's very easy to please me with South Asian food. Akbar gave me some tasty food - the channa chaat is not to be missed - and some average food - the chicken tandoori is definitely to be missed - along with slightly crusty basmati rice (for shame). I'm glad others like it so much, but I am not impressed.
The Best Brains "Semi-Homemade Angel Food 'Harvest' Cake***" Award for the worst in food on television - She's still making new episodes, you know that, right?
Big Daddy's House - Aaron McCargo had real potential, but it's just embarrassing to watch this fourth Next Food Network Chef's new show. Thanks, Gordon Elliot >:(
SUPERPERKYPEOPLE!!!!! - So, Kelsey, OMGWTFBBQ?
Courtesy of MinxEats, which made TC4, TC5 and NFNS4 bearable when the live-blogging became tedious. The following TC and NFNS photos in this section are from her blog, too.Kalamarakiaphobia - That is, fear of squid, for which Nipa is being treated.
Like, um, ewww?You'd think I hated The Next Food Network Star and loved Top Chef. Not so!
Winning cheftestant personality of the year...
Class.
Maybe these two are off having a culinary boner or something.Oh no, I think I'm straight now! And I'm blind!
And not to leave this season out: This season's asshat-in-training
Ah, Stefan. And he doesn't even have a hat. The Best Brains "Ho Ho Ho... I'mmmm Aaaanndyyyy***" Award for the most disturbing food video - YouTube should have food censors.
Puss-Filled Pimples - A YouTube Halloween recipe from the Gluten Solution. Yep, that just about sums it up.
It's not such a bad recipe - until you call it "Puss-Filled Pimples." Again, ick.
The Best Brains "Marshmallows aren't supposed to be crunchy!" Award for the worst packaged food of the year - Not everything that came into my kitchen was edible.
Diet Chocolate Cherry Dr. Pepper - Isn't this swill one of the signs of the Apocalypse?
SoyJoy - Fortified with bleh
Joyva Cherry-Flavored Marshmallow Twists - Kosher for what, insulating your attic?The Best Brains "Should my oven actually be smoking?" Award for my most failed attempts at cooking - Not everything that came out of my kitchen was edible, either.
Low-fat low-taste pumpkin-instead-of-oil-and-eggs cake mix - It. Don't. Work.
And last and certainly least...
The Best Brains Second Annual "Grill Art Cafe" Award for an exceptionally horrible dining experience - Like how the GOP felt after this year's election? Yep, you'll feel like that.
Tie: La Tasca (Spanish / Mediterranean / tapas - Inner Harbor, Baltimore) and Fisherman's Wharf (seafood - Nottingham)
For competing reasons, each of these places earns the top spot among the heaping pile of mediocrity and ick that is this list.
La Tasca is more popular than it should be - and why not? It's in a prime location. It's part of a chain of several restaurants that serve the ever-popular tapa to droves of hungry diners. I went with Cathy and a few friends for January '08's Restaurant Week. And boy, were we, um, let down. Apart from the one edible thing on our table - the calamari - just recall some of the crapola that was served to us: bland meatballs in a plain, forgettable tomato sauce, a boring-ass'd plate of mussels (at least one was dead before it hit the pan), equally flavorless salmon, the driest paella one friend had ever eaten, watered-down sangría, throwaway shrimp in "butter sauce" and garden veggies from a bag. Yuck. I'm heartened to see that so many people agree with me.
The other place is at the opposite end of the spectrum from La Tasca. Fisherman's Wharf on Belair road near Rossville Blvd had okay food. So why is it on my worst of list? The service. Here's what I ordered:
That's a fried rockfish sandwich with onion rings and hush puppies (the best part of the meal). How many customers were in there? One - me. How many people were working that day? At least two. How long did I wait for my food? A whole hour.
Yes, a whole fucking hour. By the time I left they had me wondering if they'd gone out and killed the rockfish just after I put my order in. The food was tasty, but not so tasty that it merited a whole hour wait. Long story short: if I want faster service, I'll catch, clean and fry the damn rockfish myself.
And that's it, ladies and gentlemen, and not a fashion faux pas in the house. Let's hope for as little bad dining in the '09. Gypsy, play us out, would you?
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