Goldilocks - it's not just a fairy tale character anymore

A few of the things I smuggled in my suitcase from California the other day were goodies from the brand-spanking new and glistening 99 Ranch in Rancho Cucamonga. 99 Ranch is the Chinese-American West Coast equivalent to our Korean-American H Mart here on the East Coast. One item that I bought that stood above the rest was a delicious, soft and sweet-but-not-too-sweet bread made my the baked goods and Filipino cuisine company Goldilocks. Goldilocks, my friend Gil tells me, is massively popular with Southern California's Filipino community. It offers baked goods of all varieties, specifically but not exclusively Filipino baked goods. Originally opened in 1966 in Makati, Philippines, it has now spread throughout much of the western US and Canada as well.

Ahem, the bread... A little smooshed after 7 hours and one transfer in my luggage but just as edible, flanked by a package of their little hopia bean (yellow bean) buns

Back to the bread: this soft and delicious sweet bread is Goldilocks' ube loaf bread (about $4.50 at 99 Ranch). The ube loaf is a soft purple yam bread that you pull apart into individual pieces. Hopefully, you can make it last, which is not likely. I've been eating mine with Irish butter. If only they had this stuff on the East Coast I would probably buy this a lot more often.

Come fly with me, come fly come fly away...

I am back in California for the week, visiting friends from various facets of my 6 1/2 years in the Golden State. The plane ride was not terribly appetizing: just a breakfast burrito at California Kitchen (at BWI, no less), a Nathan's hot dog at Phoenix Sky Harbor between connections, and two soft tacos from Del Taco en route to my friends' house. Okay, those weren't horrible things to eat at all. I could have imagined worse (like those vanilla Oreos I got on the Southwest flight to Phoenix).

A few more food-related things to do whilst I am in the Southland:

* Tomorrow I hit LA (another taping of G4TV's Web Soup with the awesomely funny Nerdian-American comic Chris Hardwick). While here I want to try to make as much of my meals out of food truck eating as I can (I recently did this in DC. I will write about that when I get home). If not, well LA is definitely a food city.
* Vietnamese, Thai and Mexican abound in the Inland Empire. Imma eat it all.
* Not sure what to indulge in, food wise, in Palm Springs yet. We shall see.
* Some of my closest friends are doing an all-Southern meal for me (living with his wife and daughter in Redlands now, my buddy Kurt is originally from the other end of the Chesapeake Bay - Richmond - so we both have a crab-related culinary reference point)
* Two friends of mine, Gil and Jim, have fallen in love with this new sushi place. They will take me there or I will hurt them.
* And more shopping at Fresh and Easy, Tesco's US-tailored supermarket chain.

Ah, California here I've come!

NOTE: The state-spotlight posts about Illinois will still be going up this week. I actually wrote those a few weeks ago in anticipation of the trip. Pre-scheduled auto-publishing is a beautiful thing.

Snacking State-by-State: California Part 1C (the Southern Half) - Date Shake It Up, Baby

If that Southern California institution known as the California roll was especially complicated, this next one is very much the opposite.

Snacking State-by-State: California

Official Name: State of California
State Nickname: The Golden State
Admission to the US: September 9, 1850 (#31)
Capital: Sacramento (7th largest city)
Other Important Cities: Los Angeles (largest, & 2nd largest in the USA), San Diego (2nd largest), San Jose (3rd largest), San Francisco (4th largest)
Region: West, Pacific (small sections of the state can be considered Northwest or Southwest in terms of its food and culture); Pacific (US Census)
RAFT Nations: Acorn, Chile Pepper, Pinyon Nut, Salmon
Bordered by: Baja California, Mexico (south), Arizona & Nevada (east), Oregon (north), Pacific Ocean (west)
Official State Foods and Edible Things: golden trout (fish), California Valley quail (bird), grizzly bear (animal)
Some Famous & Typical Foods: Where to begin? "New California cuisine", diversity of ethnic cuisines, especially Asian, Latin American and Mediterranean (Mexican, Chinese, Japanese, Filipino, Thai, Salvadoran, Korean, Italian), citrus (especially in the south), wine (especially in the center and north), seafood, dates, and so much else

The ever-famous date shake is a desert invention, coming from the Coachella Valley and Inland Empire regions which I am more familiar with than any other part of California. I was quite familiar with the Cabazon-based Hadley Fruit Stand and its locally famous take on the shake. I was quite unfamiliar with the seeming rivalry between Hadley and Shields Date Gardens of Indio, who makes its own variety. I ended up using a third recipe, which Saveur.com attributes to Oasis Date Gardens in Thermal, CA.

The recipe: Date Shake


This one is ridiculously simple, almost as much as the quesadilla, and I actually had all the ingredients on hand:

* milk
* vanilla ice cream
* dates - preferably pitted ones


All you do is chop the dates - about 1/2 cup or 10 dates for a single serving of milkshake - and throw them in the blender with 1/2 cup of milk.


Blend and make sure the lid is on, because those date pieces will be flying all over the blender container. Then add a cup of ice cream, blend until drinkable, and you're done.


I've never cared for milkshakes that have things floating in them, but I admit this shake could grow on me if it weren't so rich. It is indeed a rich shake, with a honeyed taste (dates will do that). A single serving only yielded about 8 ounces, and I could barely finish that due to its richness. It is a shake that is meant to be drunk slowly and savored.

Stay tuned next week, when there will be no California rolls or date shakes. I'm hitting San Fran, Berkeley, Napa - it's all Northern California, dude, and it's hella awesome!

Sources:

Mitzewich, John. How to Prepare Perfect Sushi Rice (video). About.com, date unknown.

Saveur. "Date Shake". Saveur.com (http://www.saveur.com). Originally printed in Saveur Issue #70, November 2003.

Yoshii, Ryuichi. Sushi. From the Essential Kitchen series. Periphus Editions (HK) Ltd., Boston, 1998.

Yoshizuka, Setsuko. "Making California Rolls". About.com, date unknown.

Some information also obtained from Wikipedia's "California" page and the Food Timeline State Foods webpage link to "California".

Snacking State-by-State: California Part 1B (the Southern Half) - In Which I Try to Make Sushi

Southern (and, yes, Northern) California is also home to some of the best Vietnamese, Filipino, Indian and - yes - Thai foods. The last time I was in town I think I found more Thai restaurants than Mexican, Italian or Japanese. These are just some very large drops in the multicultural bucket that is Southern California. Take Japanese food, for example.

Snacking State-by-State: California

Official Name: State of California
State Nickname: The Golden State
Admission to the US: September 9, 1850 (#31)
Capital: Sacramento (7th largest city)
Other Important Cities: Los Angeles (largest, & 2nd largest in the USA), San Diego (2nd largest), San Jose (3rd largest), San Francisco (4th largest)
Region: West, Pacific (small sections of the state can be considered Northwest or Southwest in terms of its food and culture); Pacific (US Census)
RAFT Nations: Acorn, Chile Pepper, Pinyon Nut, Salmon
Bordered by: Baja California, Mexico (south), Arizona & Nevada (east), Oregon (north), Pacific Ocean (west)
Official State Foods and Edible Things: golden trout (fish), California Valley quail (bird), grizzly bear (animal)
Some Famous & Typical Foods: Where to begin? "New California cuisine", diversity of ethnic cuisines, especially Asian, Latin American and Mediterranean (Mexican, Chinese, Japanese, Filipino, Thai, Salvadoran, Korean, Italian), citrus (especially in the south), wine (especially in the center and north), seafood, dates, and so much else

It was in Los Angeles that Japanese food, specifically sushi, spread to the rest of the country, all because of one special roll. The online Sushi Encyclopedia says more:

The California sushi roll, or simply California roll was invented in Los Angeles, California in the late 70's and is considered a big leap in sushi culture. It is also credited for spreading the popularity of sushi in the western world. Until the California roll was invented, most sushi rarely utilized ingredients that were foreign to Japanese cuisine. It was also out of the question to use imitation crab for a cuisine that concentrated on using the best seafood possible. [SushiEncyclopedia.com]

California was the site of my first sushi experience. And though the California roll was not my first taste of sushi - at least I don't think it was - it was probably the first introduction to sushi for most Americans: that maki roll with cucumber, avocado and cooked crab and/or cooked shrimp and/or imitation crab in the middle. The California roll is unquestionably American, and it seemed like an appropriate place to get my feet wet in the world of making sushi.

The recipe: California Roll

The California roll was, perhaps, one of the most time-consuming recipes I have ever made. Mind you, this was the first time I had ever made sushi of any kind, so I was bound to go slowly. On top of that, I found myself constantly running out to buy this ingredient or that. It was not an efficient or money-saving experience for me. True, it will become easier, cheaper and faster as I make more. I sure hope so anyway.


The ingredients were many and varied:

* Sushi rice (one box of 2 1/2 cups of dry rice was about $3, but there are cheaper ways to obtain it). To that you must add the following three items:
* Rice vinegar (Einstein bought mirin rice wine vinegar instead, for $3, but that turned out to work fine anyway. I originally thought I had this, but the Chinese rice vinegar I had was much darker and probably wouldn't have worked for this recipe)
* Sugar (that I have)
* Salt (again, yes. Have that)

In addition, you need the stuff that goes in the roll:

* Cucumber ($1.49 per lb. I bought two but ended up needing one)
* Avocado ($1.50 for one)
* Crab (I bought about half a pound of Alaskan king crab legs for $12 per lb - that is, $6. I could've purchased imitation crab, but I was at Whole Foods, and for some strange reason theirs was actually more expensive than the real deal. Also because a Marylander such as myself just feels weird buying imitation crab, alright?)
* Nori (about $6)
* Sesame seeds (these I had)

And I needed a bamboo mat for rolling the California roll. I was surprised that this was only about $3.50, and even came with its own wooden paddle.

There are a few steps to making a California roll, and many books for the novice sushi chef. The one I ended up using was Sushi by Ryuichi Yoshii. Yoshii's book (one of many equally useful books he has authored on this subject) has many helpful photos, an illustrated glossary and lots of basic and more advanced, creative recipes. Yoshii's steps more or less parallel the following:

1. Make the sushi rice. First, wash it two or three times until the water is relatively clear.


Mine never got completely clear, and it is recommended that you not overrinse it. Let it drain for 30 minutes to an hour, and set it in the rice cooker.

Find something else to do. I was skinning butternut squash. You'll find out why next week.

I used a rice cooker which seemed to have made for an especially sticky rice at first, but ended up being just fine.


No rice cooker? Watch John Mitzewich, whose video still helped me greatly in my first ever sushi rice making experience. About.com won't let me embed the video here. Just click on the man's name to watch how he does it.

I found this process to be the most difficult of the recipe: it seemed that both fanning the rice and drizzling the rice vinegar seasoning over it required the use of my right hand. Note: I am clearly not ambidextrous.


It will be ready for sushi-making when you can form it into a ball that stays together until you bite or dig into it.

I'm not expecting any job offers from Minato, Chiyo or RA Sushi any time soon.

In retrospect, making sushi rice (redundant, actually, since "sushi" means "vinegared rice") was easier than I thought it would be. But it still wasn't easy.

2. Next, prepare the roll itself (again, online tutorials such as this one from About.com are very helpful): lay down the nori, then with wet fingers apply and smooth out sushi rice over most of the sheet.


Depending on whether you want an inside-out roll or not, flip over the rice-covered nori or not.

If you do want an inside-out California roll, sprinkle the rice with sesame seeds...

...and turn that puppy over.

Next, place the cucumber, avocado and crab in the middle.


Roll it up as tightly as you can. Here I failed, in retrospect. My roll could have been a bit tighter because some of the pieces were a little difficult to keep from falling apart, to wit:

Yeah, make that tighter.

Help! The avocado and crab are trying to escape!

As I made more, I did get better.

Oopsie! Some overhang. Better get those kitchen shears out.
Yes I know that's cheating. I don't care.

This California roll was especially filling, and why wouldn't it be? You need about a cup of sushi rice to make one roll that can be sliced into 8 to 12 pieces. On the other hand, I ended up using only half my avocado and cucumber. Lots of rice, not lots of vegetables. It was an educational experience, I must say, and it was satisfying to know that the freshly made sushi roll in front of me was made with my own hands. But with so much effort that had to be put forth, I may hold off on making another one at least until I'm done with this State by State thing.

Sources:

Mitzewich, John. How to Prepare Perfect Sushi Rice (video). About.com, date unknown.

Saveur. "Date Shake". Saveur.com (http://www.saveur.com). Originally printed in Saveur Issue #70, November 2003.

Yoshii, Ryuichi. Sushi. From the Essential Kitchen series. Periphus Editions (HK) Ltd., Boston, 1998.

Yoshizuka, Setsuko. "Making California Rolls". About.com, date unknown.

Some information also obtained from Wikipedia's "California" page and the Food Timeline State Foods webpage link to "California".

Snacking State-by-State: California Part 1A (the Southern Half) - The Quesadilla

Ah, California, the largest state in the Union - third largest in terms of land, and with some of the largest cities in North America, including the largest in the US after New York. California is special to me, because for 6 1/2 years it was home - Riverside, Redlands and San Bernardino in the Inland Empire. That first city (the 12th largest in the state) was central to the history of the California citrus industry, that last one (only the 18th largest) being the home of the original McDonald's right along Route 66, and that middle one? Well, they have a very nice farmers' market, okay? Plus it's the home of my very first ever Trader Joe's experience. I will always be a Marylander, but California is, like, a part of me.

Okay, sappy time over.

California is one big, diverse state. And it will be a difficult state to profile, but not for lack of food. Quite the opposite, actually: the sheer diversity of its foods makes this one an entire blog waiting to happen.

In fact, it is such a massive, diverse state that I just can't restrict it to one post. So I am breaking California up over two weeks, lest I have one massive book-like post (not that I haven't done that before). Next week I head up to Northern California. This week, we stick with the Southern half.

Snacking State-by-State: California

Official Name: State of California
State Nickname: The Golden State
Admission to the US: September 9, 1850 (#31)
Capital: Sacramento (7th largest city)
Other Important Cities: Los Angeles (largest, & 2nd largest in the USA), San Diego (2nd largest), San Jose (3rd largest), San Francisco (4th largest)
Region: West, Pacific (small sections of the state can be considered Northwest or Southwest in terms of its food and culture); Pacific (US Census)
RAFT Nations: Acorn, Chile Pepper, Pinyon Nut, Salmon
Bordered by: Baja California, Mexico (south), Arizona & Nevada (east), Oregon (north), Pacific Ocean (west)
Official State Foods and Edible Things: golden trout (fish), California Valley quail (bird), grizzly bear (animal)
Some Famous & Typical Foods: Where to begin? "New California cuisine", diversity of ethnic cuisines, especially Asian, Latin American and Mediterranean (Mexican, Chinese, Japanese, Filipino, Thai, Salvadoran, Korean, Italian), citrus (especially in the south), wine (especially in the center and north), seafood, dates, and so much else

Whole encyclopedias could be written about the foods of California, so pardon me for trying to sum it all up in a paragraph or two. A few thoughts come to mind. California cuisine is

• Native American, with sedentary hunter-gatherers living off of the rich resources to be found here and in Baja California. One of the most important traditional foods was the acorn, which has to be prepped a special way to keep one from becoming ill. It was often made into several kinds of mushes.
• Spanish and Mexican, with much of the same Southwestern influences that we see in Arizona & New Mexico, and much of the same foods spreading up from Baja.
• pioneer food, with many of those Midwestern and Southern food traditions carried in by 49ers, Mormons and other settlers into the area
• a plethora of immigrant cuisines - so many of the "ethnic" foods that we sometimes think of as American either flourished in California, or spread from Cali to the rest of the country: Vietnamese phở, Filipino longannisa, Thai pad thai, Japanese sushi and Chinese dim sum just to name a few.
• Wine Country. They even made a movie about it, remember? Seriously, California's many wine producing valleys produce some of the best wine in the world, at some competitions rivaling even those from France. Napa and Sonoma are the most famous, though living for so long in the Southland, I've become more familiar with Temecula's much less well known wines.
  
• "California cuisine" - exemplified by the freshest ingredients prepared in season. That comes with a de-emphasis on the Frankenstrawberries and Killer Tomatoes that are grown all over Cali and shipped to all points of the country, humongous and plump and lacking any discernible flavor (related note: California was also the home of Chicano activist César Chávez, who worked to organize migrant agribusiness farm workers so they could have at least a somewhat decent standard of living).
  

Since I am extending California over two posts, I will be doing a few from the more Mission-y Southern half, and a few from the more Gold-Rush-y Northern half. This post deals with the Southern half of the state. Southern California is much more familiar to me, and it will end up being the longer post, I just know it.

Southern California and Mexico - specifically Baja California - have a very special relationship, and some of the best Mexican food in our own country is right in SoCal - both the traditional and "taco shop" varieties. In fact, taco shops are as prevalent in the Southland as crab houses are here in the Chesapeake. It is real local food, and you will be hard-pressed not to find some corner that doesn't have takeout with tacos, tamales, burritos, enchiladas, quesadillas and so on, often with a hearty helping of beans and rice, pickled vegetables and your choice of salsas frescas, verdes and rojas. There were just too many to define any one favorite of mine. I would normally order an enchilada, though for a quick meal, a quesadilla is always a safe bet.

The recipe: Cheese Quesadilla


This is incredibly easy, and if you have all the ingredients (as I did), fast:

* tortillas (I prefer corn but I had flour)
* your choice of cheese (I had two on hand: Wisconsin cheddar and Honduran queso fresco)

I don't need to cite any specific recipe for this one, as I have made it before. Simply assemble the following:


tortilla, topped with cheese, topped with tortilla. Chicken is also a popular filling, though I prefer the simple one myself, filled with gooey cheese and nothing more.


Heat in a skillet until the tortillas are browned and the cheese is melted (also flip the quesadilla over to make sure it browns on both sides). Top it with your choice of salsa.

Or just leave it plain like I did

Sources:

Mitzewich, John. How to Prepare Perfect Sushi Rice (video). About.com, date unknown.

Saveur. "Date Shake". Saveur.com (http://www.saveur.com). Originally printed in Saveur Issue #70, November 2003.

Yoshii, Ryuichi. Sushi. From the Essential Kitchen series. Periphus Editions (HK) Ltd., Boston, 1998.

Yoshizuka, Setsuko. "Making California Rolls". About.com, date unknown.

Some information also obtained from Wikipedia's "California" page and the Food Timeline State Foods webpage link to "California".

I have to start eating healthier

As my laptop battery was dying on the plane, it dawned on me that I was finally in the unique position of being able to blog about what I eat from 30,000 feet in the air! This is courtesy of AirTran, whose internet access is not free despite what their flight attendants might suggest. Were that AirTran one of those small percentages of airlines that offers anything more than little itty bitty cookies or a small bag of pretzels. Too bad I didn't bring in my greasy, salty, and not altogether appetizing breakfast sandwich from the Quizno's in D Terminal next to my gate.

At least I got filled up on a Tacos Del Carbón meal at Del Taco w/ crinkle fries and a Diet Coke. That's because my friends whom I am staying with are starting NutriSystem in order to lose a few pounds.

Man, I need to eat better. I really do.

California Here I Come...

I'm flying out very early in the morning. Not sure why I am still awake. Just hope I can eke out as much life from my battery as humanly possible.

Food finds I haven't gotten around to posting...

Just a few odds and ends - things that have gotten away from me over the last month or so. I meant to write about 'em but I never bothered.

1. Poorman's Mess

You remember that little old lady who kept talking about Depression-Era cooking on YouTube? I made Clara's recipe for Poorman's Meal. It really doesn't taste very good. But hell, are you gonna care about that if you're living through a depression? Considering that, it's damn near haute cuisine!

2. Kroger's Deli
The Cincinnati-based Kroger's food chain spans much of the Midwest and South. The one in Hinesville, GA, has just about the best ready-to-eat food of any spermarket deli counter I have ever ordered from. I got three BBQ ribs (which actually amounted to six), mac & cheese and Western fries. I could only finish half of it.

3. Southern BBQ done right

My sister and her husband introduced me to the delicious BBQ at the Clubhouse in Rye Patch in nearby Ludowici.

The fried pickles were definitely different from those you might find at Sonic: saltier, lighter, picklier, a little less greasy. This is the type of thing that I would eat all day, even though I know it would kill me.

Their sampler plate was very filling, and again I could not finish half of it (I left for home before I could finish it, and James finished the rest for me). The meats really outshone the sides - the cole slaw was tasty and had a flavor I can't quite place, though the mac & cheese was okay. I just can't begin to describe the ribs, sliced butt and chicken. Soooooooo good.

4. Mrs. Holmes' Boiled Peanuts

You can find these at convenience stores all over Georgia and South Carolina, in the same type of hot containers you might find nacho cheese. Margaret Holmes' Boiled Peanuts - I got a small container for about $1.50 in several places. Available in original or Cajun. Oh good Lord, I feel like I'm shilling for peanuts now.

5. In-N-Out

We may not have a Sonic closer than 50 miles to Baltimore, but we could one day. We will never have an In-N-Out anywhere near us. For my last meal before setting foot on the plane to BWI last month I had to stop at the Ontario Mills In-N-Out, the fabled hamburger place that makes everything from scratch and to order, and makes the BBQ ribs I got from Kroger's look like health food. Some of you may know that In-N-Out serves three value meals, and that's it: the hamburger, the cheeseburger and the fabled "Double Double" (two patties). By default, each comes with tomatoes, lettuce, thick onion slices and "special sauce" (it's Thousand Island Dressing). It comes with fries that are cut on site from actual potatoes, and a drink that is either soda or milkshake. Their milkshakes are fabled, too.

What's perhaps as famous is their "Secret menu" that isn't listed on their drive thru menu. Instead, you have to be a local "in the know." Or else find it online, either on In-N-Out's website or listed by others (such as this compilation from Badmouth.net). I didn't get too secret-menu-ish, and merely order the burger "toasted" - that's a regular burger on a toasted bun - with "light" (underfried) fries. I wasn't too crazy about them.

I wanted to order the Animal Burger - a patty with mustard mixed into it, and extra sauce. But I forgot the name so I didn't want to sit there for five minutes trying to remember, holding up the drive thru line and missing on dropping off my rental car and, from there, catching my flight.

I devoured the burger in the airport, plus half of the lackluster fries (I'm not a fry person anyway). And you should've seen me suck down that milkshake, since they wouldn't have let me take it through the security line. Ice-cream-headache-induced painful bliss, that's all I can say.

You should've seen the milkshake-related pun I was going to use to segue into the next bit...

6. Gay Pride Block Partay!!! (and Parade)

Unlike most major cities, Baltimore's Gay Pride Parade is kind of, um, (What's the word I'm looking for?) low-scale. Though I did get pelted by paraders throwing both Mardi Gras beads and Tootsie Rolls in festive rainbow-colored papers. Was I the only one who thought it strange that Chipotle had a float? Ah well, at least we're in the age when corporations are more likely than they used to be to even show their faces in a gay pride parade! And you gotta love that slogan - yes, the guy's T shirt does say "¿Homo estás?"

My friends were right, though - the Block Party is better than the following day's festival, which I didn't even bother with. After flitting back & forth between the Hippo and the Central Station, with some quality time in Minato for supper - I didn't even want to bother.

Mind you, the food was pretty lackluster at the Block Party. I mean, LGBT pride events aren't exactly known as culinary meccas. But this one sign was just too strange to pass by:

What famous Thai Mexican Food do they mean, anyway? Much better was the gelato I got at Marie Louise Bistro (I'm glad I gave them a second try), though their mimosas were pretty watered down for my tastes.

7. Stuff what was shipped to me from California

Because it wouldn't fit into my luggage, I had to mail some food back to Baltimore. Most of it was from the Chinese-American supermarket chain 99 Ranch and the British-based supermarket chain Fresh & Easy.

My last day in SoCal last month, I went crazy with non-perishable groceries in the Fresh & Easy. I haven't had a chance to try any of these goodies yet, but I did score some brownie mix, raspberry-chipotle and peanut sauces, chai and chocolate black teas - all Fresh & Easy brand - and Singapore Noodles from the Sof'ella Food Company, whose products I have never seen this side of the Mississippi River. I look forward to trying them all, especially the brownie mix. I had an actual brownie from Fresh & Easy, and if it's from the same ingredients then the mix should be good.

From 99 Ranch, I picked up some loose tea in a lovely decorative jar (Gil already had some and made some for us at his place). I also picked up two cans of Chaokoh coconut milk, a highly recommended brand, before realizing that you can, in fact, find this brand in Maryland after all. I also got some desserts. One was a confection of taro paste covered in white chocolate. It tastes better than it sounds. Actually, it tastes pretty good.

The other thing I got was a heart-shaped plastic container filled with - you won't believe this - candied olives.

Yes, candied olives.

In a moment that I can only describe as Andrew Zimmern-esque in its bizarreness, I bit into the candied olive, an uncured olive coated in sugar, with the pit still in it of course. I can proudly say that I tried it. I can firmly say that I not only will not be eating this again, but I that I could not even finish the one olive I bit into, and threw it and the rest of the container away - but only after spitting out what little was in my mouth. I mean, yeeeeekhkh.

How to Pack Beer and Wine into Your Luggage

Yesterday was my day to reminisce around the Inland Empire and stock up on groceries that I cannot find Back East. I am surprised that I only spent $14 at the Fresh and Easy on supplies to take back home. I also went to BevMo, the local big box store for beer, wine and liquor, to pick up a 12-pack of Fat Tire Beer. Again, this is the good stuff that we can't get in Maryland or almost anywhere east of the Mississippi River (they sell it in Tennessee, and maybe now North Carolina, but I'm not hedging my bets on that).

If I lived in most other states, this would not be a problem, and I could just ship it back home. But we live in a state with such blaring blue laws that we are not even allowed to mail alcoholic beverages to our own houses. They can also sell alcohol in their supermarkets outside the Old Line State, people. On Sundays. Everywhere. It's true, people.

So my real challenge was to find some way to fit all this beer, along with the two bottles of wine from Rancho Cucamonga's Joseph Filippi Winery, into my luggage while at the same time:

1. making sure they don't break; and
2. making sure they don't push the total weight of the luggage above 50 lbs.

After doing some quick research on the internet, I found some good tips from people who transport or have transported a lot of beer and wine through their luggage. The most common tips I found suggested the following for a case of beer: wrap each bottle in a sock (and/or bubble wrap), and then zip it up in a Ziploc bag. Make sure the beers are all packed as close to the center of your luggage as possible. It's similar for wine: wrap each bottle in a towel and/or bubble wrap, and then wrap it all in a plastic bag. If you have a big enough Ziploc bag, put it in there.

Since I couldn't really use other people's socks, I had to buy some. This required a trip to the local 99¢ Only (a big and increasingly popular chain in California and much of the Southwest), where I bought two packages of ankle biters for a grand total of $1 each. Add to that a box of 12 Ziploc bags for $1 and two dish towels for $1 each, and I was ready to do my packing (NB: I also found Cadbury Cream Eggs from Easter for 25¢ each; only a few were oozing).

When I found out that a 12 pack of Fat Tire weighs all of 15 pounds (thanks for the use of the scale, Jim), I had the new problem of decreasing the weight in my suitcase. As a result, I am using some of my clothes as packing material for those groceries I bought.

Awww... the world's first beer cozy

My first step was to take the beer out of its box and start wrapping each one in a sock. At first I just slipped it over the beer, but I figured out that by readjusting the sock I could cover top and bottom, and then staple the sock shut. The part of the sock that still exposed some of the bottle got some toilet paper stuffed next to it before I fit it snugly into its gallon-size Ziploc bag.

I felt like a mad scientist

With all of the extra padding I could only fit ten of the bottles into the box. Don't fret, beer fans! I left some for Gil (I would've left some for Jim, but he isn't really a beer person). Even better, after all was said and done the total weight of the box had decreased to 13.5 pounds! That was minus 2.5 pounds for losing two bottles of beer, and adding one pound of packing material (socks, Ziploc bags, newspaper, tape).

The things one will do for beer

The wines, which added another 7 pounds of weight, were a different matter, as they didn't come in their own convenient box. The first step was to wrap each wine bottle in its own towel, and then wrap the towel in a plastic bag.

A nice rosé towels off after a hard day of being a rosé

Voila! The final product. Yes, those are Berger's cookies in the background. I always bring them as gifts. Of course, I've heard no complaints yet.

After sandwiching the 13.5 lb box of Fat Tire and the two Joseph Filippi Wines into my suitcase amidst tennis shoes, travel kit and clothes, I took one final measurement. The final weight: 40 pounds! I had a convenient 10 lb buffer zone just in case I needed to slip something else into my luggage.

I'll let you know tomorrow how well it worked.

Photos from WeHo

I took a trip into West Hollywood today. I was pleasantly surprised by some things, unpleasantly surprised by a few others. Among the unpleasant shocks was the closing of A Different Light, a longtime LGBT bookstore that had news, books, movies and bumper stickers. The key word is "had" - right now there's nothing but a "For Lease" sign in the window. There's still one in San Fran and, perhaps, New York. Another unpleasant surprise - okay, it was not a surprise, as I should have seen this coming - was the traffic on Santa Monica Blvd. It seems almost like the most congested street in Los Angeles County. But you do get a good cross section of the variety of cultures in WeHo, including Guatemalan, Mexican and Armenian.

There was a lot of good (and okay) stuff I found. The best was in the food category. First I came across the small Champagne French Bakery & Café, which had lots of pastries and sandwiches. I got a large meringue "cookie" ($1.29). I ate this one as I walked searching for lunch, noticing all the No on Prop 8 and Defend Marriage Equality signs in the windows of businesses everywhere.

The cookie

Oddly enough for someone who likes exploring the eating options around town, I usually stick very close to the familiar in West Hollywood. I vowed to explore a bit more today. I almost hit one Japanese place that had a very promising-sounding appetizer of jalapeño pepper stuffed with spicy tuna. But the big green "B" from the LA County Board of Health (as in A, B, C, D or F) deterred me.

After considering a big, juicy burger in the heart of Gym Bunny Country, I eventually came upon Bossa Nova, a Brazilian restaurant near the intersection of Robertson and Santa Monica Blvd (there are four total in the LA area). In this charming little restaurant I had one of my first tastes of Brazilian cuisine. There were a lot of things on the menu that didn't strike me as particularly Brazilian, such as the many pasta dishes and the Cuban sandwich, though I suppose it's not difficult to find these dishes in Brazil at all. but I went for the more authentically Brazilian food. Along with the iced tea, I started with a coxinha ($4) as an appetizer.

The coxinha - outside...

The coxinha is a croquette of chicken and Brazilian cheese, fried and shaped to look like a chicken leg (though it really just looks like a big tear drop). The inside was creamy, and not what I usually go for, but I guess I don't eat a lot of croquettes.

...and inside

It was pretty flavorful, despite the weird creaminess of the croquette (again, a failing of all croquettes).

I enjoyed the main course much better, the traditional chicken dish ($8): flattened, coated in Brazilian spices and grilled, and served with rice, beans, fresh salsa and fried plantains.

The chicken

The sides were tasty, though the chicken did steal the meal. It was juicy in most places (only dry in one or two), and very flavorful in its tangy mix of spices. I wish I could place the spices that were on the chicken, but I can't. The final price was about $13. I don't know if they forgot to charge me for the iced tea or if it was just complementary with the lunch special.

Before leaving, I took a nice, long walk around WeHo, stopping to look around in the French Market, really just a big restaurant with some store fronts on the side. I also stopped at a new storefront near the Bossa Nova called Millions of Milkshakes. They are to milkshakes what The Fractured Prune is to donuts or Cold Stone Creamery is to ice cream. It features unique milkshake concoctions, many named after celebrities (Miley Cyrus, for example). I got a plain and very average small chocolate milkshake ($4). True, it wasn't the fanciest shake, but if they only do so-so on such a typical milkshake, what will their fancier ones come out like? It wasn't bad, though I just hope the other 999,999 milkshakes are better.

Other photos -

I have no idea what this sign says. I just know it's an Armenian market on Santa Monica Blvd, in Little Armenia outside of WeHo.

A big chair needs a big ass.

Just another day opening up another yogurt shop

Boy, Suzanne Somers must get bored behind that glass all day.

One of many options I considered for lunch was Rage. Jim and I ate here a few years ago. I got a very good tomato-basil soup. There was nobody there, so I left.

All I can say is: it looks, um, cocky...

I also drove up into the Hills. No - the real Hills. Why the hell anyone would want to live in this labyrinthine tangle of difficult-to-manage uphill-downhill streets is beyond me (apart from the obvious status it gains you).

This is a monument at the corner of Crescent Heights and Santa Monica. It commemorates a two week long peaceful demonstration in September 1991 in protest of then-guv Pete Wilson's veto of a bill that would guarantee that people would be protected in the workplace regardless of their sexual orientation. The protest culminated in a march on Sacramento, which is on the other end of the state. And now we're fighting for marriage rights in the state. We've come a long way, indeed.

One of many massive billboards advertising TV shows and movies along Sunset Blvd. This one touts True Blood, which my friends have introduced me to on this trip. It's very good from what little I've seen of it. I could say that the show sucks, but it's about vampires so that would be gratuitous.