Presidential Burgers

I saw this the other day on the rarely watched, occasionally unwatchable CBS Early Show. Chef Michael Schlow tailor-made burgers for each of the two major party presidential and vice presidential candidates, using stories, scandals, speeches and Mr/Mrs Potato Heads for inspiration.



In alphabetical order by name:

For Sen. Biden (D-Delaware): Easily the most complicated burger, for the most verbose candidate - the "Bluehen-Footinmouth Burger", made from the official bird of Delaware, the blue hen (or if lacking that, capon or turkey), covered in sauteed blue foot Chanterelle mushrooms. Dijon and rosemary also go on the burger. Perfect for bringing on the Acela Express from Wilmington to Washington.

For Sen. McCain (R-Arizona): a Southwestern-themed patty of short-rib meat, covered in Navy bean paste and a nopal-tomatillo salsa. And well-aged cheddar. Very well-aged. Might be irritable though (for the colon, I mean)!

For Sen. Obama (D-Illinois): the "Barack-o-Burger", using a different ingredient for each of the letters in Obama's name: Onion-Bacon-American cheese-Mayo-Arugula (and Schlow came up with the "arugula" on his own, no dig, he swears!). On 80-20 ground chuck, or preferably Kobe beef, since his campaign has enough to pay for such a burger.

For Gov. Palin (R-Alaska): hockey-puck sliders, hold the lipstick (her words, not mine). And not a moose in sight, dontcha' kno', but they can be made more authentic with moose meat. Serve with Russian dressing to everybody but your brother-in-law.

As usual, the third party candidates are ignored. Any ideas for them? I'm eager to hear ideas for these people:

• Ex. Rep Bob Barr (L-Georgia)
• Ex. Rep. Cynthia McKinney (G-Georgia)
• Consumer advocate Ralph Nader (I-Connecticut)